Today's post is a guest post from my warm and loving friend, Vidya Sury and a fellow A-Z participant. I found Vidya through Write Tribe, a vibrant community of writers and bloggers who encourage each other by sharing, commenting and helping out where possible.
She is an ace blogger, in every sense of the word, whether it's in terms of content, quality, technical know-how or just knowing how to use the right words to get her message across.
But that's how I met her. Not how I fell in love with her. Vidya is the kind of person who is there for you- in every sense of the word. When I went through a rough patch, emotionally and physically, Vidya was there for me, reaching out and consoling me. She kept checking up on me, the way a wonderful friend does. Vidya, it is an honour to have you on my blog today.
Vidya Sury is a Mom
| Writer | Editor | Blogger | Social media explorer. She views
the world through pink colored spectacles, coated with compassion and
believes in giving.
loves her work, writing, her coffee, friends, family, DIY craft,
books, music, cooking and photography. Her hobbies are collecting
smiles and inspiring happiness.
My best example of parenting is, naturally, my Mom. She was an outstanding example of the phrase "positive parenting". As a child of the 60's, when we had practically zero technology to amuse and entertain ourselves with, I am grateful for the time she devoted to me. She inculcated certain habits in me that I follow to this day.
I was lucky to go to the same school as she did, and we even had the same teacher, can you imagine? Perhaps because of her single parent status, my Mom and I shared an extra-special bond that was more friendship.
Even in those days, she made it a point to talk to me every day - and that was not easy, because she worked as a teacher and attended part-time classes to complete her education. In spite of her hectic schedule, she was always kind and smiling. I still marvel at how someone could be so nice.
I’ve imbibed several positive parenting lessons from her and here are some of the ways I practice them.
Communication is perhaps the basic foundation of positive parenting. As long as we can talk about anything freely, everything is going to be a-okay!
- Love is always the answer. No matter how mad I get with my son, I make sure we sort it out as quickly as possible. No silent sulking.
- Never go to bed in anger. I kiss and make up if that is the last thing I do. Children can get on our nerves...after all, they're growing up and learning. Parents are here to understand and guide them, empathize with them.
- Never too busy to listen, within reason, whenever my son has something to share. He complements this, in turn, by understanding when I am actually busy with work.
- Make it a point to spend time together every day – sharing the day’s happenings, exercising together and having dinner together.
- No yelling, no harsh words.
- Never ever scold him or pull him up in front of anyone.
- Never compare him with others.
- No performance pressure. Instead, I focus on helping him develop good habits and in the process, learn a lot.
- Encouragement must be consistent, no matter what. Praise can be occasional.
- Always have a solid dose of humor at the ready. Seeing the funny side solves problems faster than any words or gestures can.
- Pray together every day.